I may seem to be in love with a woman because she is a woman of beautiful image and stature. I may be married to a woman because the law of man dictates we are married in writing based on the written law of man. However, if I love a woman and she loves me back, I will only consider myself united to her if God united us by His grace, not by what the law of marriage requires. But even if we are united by God, I do not consider her to be my wife nor must she consider me also as her husband. Because true children of God are not given in marriage (Luke 20:35) and no matter the language of man speaks, we both have one true husband who is our Creator (Isaiah 54:5).
I do not love a woman though by what I see on her body but what I see in her soul. For if God is inside her then it is Him whom I love and not truly her, neither her flesh. For if it is not God who is inside her, yet I love her still, then I love (and lust for) the flesh and the one whom the flesh belongs to: the flesh belongs to this world, and this world belongs to the prince of evil. Therefore I love evil if I love the flesh, and not God who resides in her, if ever God is in her. But if God is not present in her, no matter how beautiful she is from the outside, then I can not truly love her ever.
Since God is love (1 John 4:16), because God loved us first (1 John 4:19), how can we say we love each other if God is not in us? If we say we love each other, yet God is not in both of us, then it is not true love that we feel. And that kind of feeling is not going to last, and our relationships will only lead to dissatisfaction, disputes, distrust, disagreements, disunity. Because it is only the love that is God that will truly bind us together forever: our union that is made by God and of God; the love that is in us when God is present in both of us. If God is not in us then it is not love that we feel, and we will never know what love truly is. But if God is in us, we will always understand each other no matter what the situation dictates.